It started out as any other British manor house, then it got a bit odd. Lesson learned: Stoners apparently make excellent decorators.
Cardiff Castle is a trip.
It started out like any normal Welsh castle, still containing its old Medieval keep and walls. However, a new addition was added in the Victorian era, a stunning Gothic revival mansion.
In 1848, the new Lord Bute inherited the castle. He utterly despised the existing castle believing that it represented a mediocre attempt at Gothic style. So, he added his own eclectic touch to the existing mansion from the Georgian Period. He ended up hiring the famous William Burges to remodel the place, allowing Burges unlimited funds and free rein to do whatever. Bad Idea, Lord Bute.
The insane Cardiff Castle Mansion.
This arrangement suited William Burges who worked on the castle until his death. Burges was one of the greatest of the Victorian art-architects and probably the most eccentric. Burges was also a raving opium addict. Seriously, only a guy stoned out of his mind could design this house. It explains everything.
I knew I was in for something great the second I saw this clock tower.
The first thing you notice when you walk up to this grand castle is the 150 ft clock tower built in 1868. I heard that the inside of the castle was interesting but did not put a lot of research into it. I saw the tower from outside of the walls, across the street, the first glimmer of what was to come. Since the National Museum in Cardiff was closed that day, I figured why not spend the couple extra pounds on the guided tour, so worth it. Without the tour, you are only able to view a few rooms, and not even the best ones. I had to wait on this covered corridor on the walls to be let into the second floor of the castle. The amazing guide, full of energy and a sense of humor, told us to be ready for a treat. A treat it was.
Ornate fireplace of the Winter Smoking room, one of many in this crazy mansion.
The first thought that came to mind after walking into the first room was, “What the…” This room is covered with paintings and carvings depicting the seasons, myths and fables. The Winter Smoking Room is located in the tower, and also served a purpose as a place where the occult could be practiced in private, of course, by men only. The fireplace above was carved by a master carver, who carved the intricate designs in many fireplaces in the castle. The friezes where carved on a single large block of stone, and then painted, no longer looking like a stone carving. Paintings depicting astrological animals cover the ceiling.
Celestial animals climb all over the ceiling and walls.
Hidden compartments abound in the cabinet and under the bench seats, hiding the objects good Christians should not have, whatever they may be. Even the corners of the ceiling have their own embellishments.
A corner boss, representing Dusk.
The most dismal nursery ever.
The tour continued into the creepiest nursery ever. From the above picture, it does not seem so bad, just a little dismal for a place where children played. A broad frieze of hand painted tiles runs around the wall, depicting fairy tales and stories, each one labeled; “Jack and the Beanstalk” and “The Invisible Man.”
Can you see the Invisible Man?
Oh, I should not forget to mention, the scene depicting three decapitated heads on pikes carried by a couple of guys by the fireplace. Yes, that is in the nursery, a bit morbid don’t you think.
The decapitated heads on pikes, next to the fireplace that is the representation of “Fame” inspired by Chaucer’s House of Fame.
Next stop is the Arab Room (not sure one could name a room that nowadays), located in the Herbert Tower. Smoking rooms in the house were designed to be solely male-orientated; this on the other hand, was designed as a female drawing room. It would have made a lovely drawing room, if one could concentrate on the paper, because seriously, I wouldn’t be able to look down with that ceiling above.
The most awesome ceiling ever in a house, screw frescoes, I’ll take this.
Burges inspiration for this room came from his travels to Constantinople and Sicily where he was exposed to Moorish medieval art. This extraordinary ceiling is made of ornate carved woodwork and guided in gold leaf, and by far the most expense room in the house, although it is quite small. This room is not usually open for tours, but since the group I was with small, the awesome tour guide let us in. Jealous people who did not pay for the tour looked in with extreme envy. Only from entering the room one can truly experience this outrageous design.
This is one epic ceiling.
Just a monkey chilling with his shield.
We headed out of the Arab Room to go to the banquet hall, passing a painting of a monkey with sunglasses on the wall.
The epic Banquet Hall, still used for banquets today.
The banquet hall and the library below sit on the site of the old medieval hall. The murals were painted by the same artist as the ones in the nursery. Both the murals and chimney piece recount the exploits of Robert the Consul, who built the Norman keep in the castle. The depictions of medieval life cover the walls of the hall.
The fireplace, of course it’s in the shape of a castle, otherwise it would be too boring.
A monk hard at work above the door.
One of the rooms grandest features is that of the hammerbeam roof, inspired by church architecture, complete with creepy angels.
I’m not sure I would like to be stared at by angels while stuffing my face.
We next headed up this plain spiral staircase to the bachelor suite in the Clock Tower. This room is famous for its religious additions to the décor, the bronze statue of John the Baptist on the fireplace and its ornately jeweled and carved walls.
A very pretty room for a bachelor.
All this seems to be a bit much for occasional stays from the marquess before he got married, until you see the mirrored ceiling. The 189 beveled glass mirrors are designed to reflect Bute’s first name “John” in Greek in both true and mirror images. I am just going to take their word for it.
The completely innocent mirrored ceiling.
The next room, the Roof Garden, is where I completely lost it. It still cracked me up the second time I visited the castle. Only way I can describe it as, “Pompeii meets What The…”
The Roof Garden, combination of Pompeii and Hebrew?
Taking the design of a classical garden, a peristyle surrounds a sunken tiled courtyard with a Roman style fountain in the middle. The tiles, same artist as the rest of the house, were covered with scenes from the Old Testament story of Elijah, punctuated with shutters opening to the outside of the tower. This room probably would crack me up more than most people. What made me lose it was the combination of “traditional” Roman style, complete with similar fresco layout, and, well, Hebrew, in rows on the wall. The design of this room is so outrageous, topped off with the fact that it is on top of one of the towers of the house, with an open ceiling.
I don’t think the Romans really liked the Hebrews that much.
We headed down the tower, the tour was over, only a few rooms on the first floor to be seen, including the library.
A bit of book porn.
The library is located directly underneath the banquet hall. The library is one of the calmest rooms in the castle. Ornate carvings are still on every surface, depicting real and mythological animals. More references to Hebrew and characters from the Bible are carved around the room. However, my favorite carvings are the Darwin Monkeys located around one of the doors leading into the library. Lord Bute apparently hated Darwin enough to make fun of him on the doorways of his library.
I think that he may be a little frustrated at the other monkey who keeps trying to peek at his book.
And so, ends the adventure through the most insane Victorian mansion ever. The lesson to be learned here: Do not hire a guy who gets stoned all the time to decorate your house, or your child’s nursery may have decapitated heads on the walls. Unless you are into that sort of thing…no judgment.
Let’s not forget the normal looking Norman keep on the castle grounds. Cardiff Castle was actually working castle once.
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